[Rant] God’s Gonna Trouble the Water – The Originals 5×07

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The Good, The Bad and The Vamp

Warnings: spoilers alert, inappropriate jokes, salty comments, just the usual stuff. The gifs aren’t mine.

  • How many episodes do we actually have this season? First of all, I find the lack of Kol and Rebekah very jarring. The actor and actress may have been engaged with other projects but come on, it’s the final season; at least allow the audience to see more of them. We still don’t know what the hell Rebekah’s been doing since she refused Marcel’s proposal (and called Caroline to check on her brother, pfff). Second, the story seems to be lacking focus and the Nazi vampires don’t pose as big a threat as they’re built to be so and they certainly lack organization, unlike the season three’s Stryx (even that was underdeveloped storyline) – they’re more like a bunch of ragtag bloodsuckers than anything. Easily squashed by either Marcel or Klaus or both once they stop their plague of overestimating the enemies and get their asses into real action. Come on. Marcel didn’t die and came back a super unkillable vampire and Klaus isn’t an Original Hybrid just so they have to tiptoe around dealing with that bunch of mortal vampires. Have. their. heads. already. Period. What happens to the “Not a head garden, just your head” badass boast? Don’t they want to avenge Hayley’s death? Guess they only have enough budget for epic mob fights for the first season.

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  • Plec’s talent of bringing a wrecking ball to her own shows is in full swing. Sigh. This season’s getting a lot of vibes from TVD’s season five, which marks where the series was going downhill. Really down and never up again.

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  • Caroline’s letter is a nice gesture and also further cements my belief (not that it needs to) that she’s as relevant to the current storyline as Lucien and Tristan (both dead, in case you forget). Cut out or replace all her scenes and everything remains unchanged. Take this letter for an example. Cut it out and we’d have had about 2 minutes to do whatever else, like Rebekah calls and asks after Hayley and Hope.
  • That reminds me neither Rebekah nor Elijah has had a scene with Hope since last season.
  • This is just so wrong since one of them advocated for Hope’s existence and the other acted as her surrogate parent for nine months.

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  • It’s the Crescent’s Alpha’s second line and nobody (or wolves) from the Crescent shows up. What the heck? Why do the writers have their characters saying how Hayley was loved and respected by everyone in town and yet none shows up except terrorist-wannabes?
  • What’s wrong with Freya in this scene?! She’s one of the most powerful witches in town and when the terrorist-wannabes strike, all she does is get pushed aside by Hope and shout for Josh’s help?! What happens to the witch who snaps vampires’ necks and melts their brains with her fingers? Her powers are taking a rain check? This is a perfect opportunity to show (and remind) the audience how powerful and badass the firstborn witch of the Mikaelsons is because frankly Freya hasn’t gotten any action as of late. Even Ivy is getting more action than her.

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  • Shout out to writers who created their characters to be canonically powerful only to have them act entirely powerless when it matters.

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  • It’s either me bitchin’ or the season is really falling apart much like the Other Side.

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  • But the silver lining is I got my Klelijah dose, which is fine.

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  • I don’t recall Klaus creating any hybrids since TVD’s season four. Those hybrids were sired by Hope, why are they running to Klaus’s beck and call? That is so weird.
  • What’s with all the hate directed towards Antoinette? In-show, it’s justifiable since Marcel and Klaus hate her mommy and bro’s guts but out-show?? So far Antoinette has been a fairly decent character. Not only does she have the look, she has the style and a classic, elegant air that is pretty hard to find in modern-day vampire shows – again I’m gonna bring up Anne Rice’s vampires. She even shows dignity when remaining calm in the face of death. And up to this point, she stays clean of her parents’ doctrine and plans and she isn’t an enemy of the Mikaelsons. So what is it about her that makes fans detest her and even wish for her (agonizing) death by Klaus’s venom? Is it just because she comes as an ‘obstacle’ for the Haylijah ship?

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  • Most favorite thing of the episode: Again, the songs.

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