Episode 150815

Nice combination of number!

This month is, for all of you who are obsessed with horoscopes, is the month of Leo. An acquaintance said that her Moon Leo was thriving with this month, making her excited and buzzing with inspiration and ideas. I, who is also a Moon Leo, absolutely do not feel the same. As a matter of face, the Leo in me possibly thinks this month is a right time for hibernation and all he wishes to do is sleeping it away like a lazy big cat we sometimes forget he is. Work, write, eat, watch TV, sleep, the cycle of my daily routines just spins, nothing new, nothing too excited. I’m still writing, of course, otherwise I will suffer from withdrawal – writing withdrawal it should be called; still, my inspiration runs low and I’m not getting any new idea except for that ‘Why Won’t You Die?” fic I’m not sure if anyone is reading at all. And even that fic is on a hiatus as I struggle to finish chapter 7.

Like I’ve said before, I’m at the mercy of my inspiration and boy, sometimes it proves to be a real bitch.


I rummaged in an old box and found this piece. It was from an ex-friend’s (a tiny kudo for me to come up with that term) gift – she knew I had a penchant for collecting jewelry and she gave it to me, one piece only because it was more stylish to wear it on one ear than both. I actually liked this little skull and it says something because I rarely receive presents and when I do, I often like the present out of courtesy. It somewhat proved that she knew my preference and cared enough to cater to it. However, this pretty skull didn’t stop us from ending our friendship in a nonsense manner.

Now that I’m looking at this stud earring, I’m reminded that the reason why I’ve never worn it is because it lacked a small rubber (or sometimes metal, it depends) stopper, which serves to hold the earring in place (on a side note, I think some people might not know that little piece is called so I bold and italize it, you’re welcome). Lost in delivery, possibly. Never had I known it could be a foreshadow of our short-lived friendship, if it ever was friendship at all.

There’s a quote of Timon from The Lion King (1996): “When the world turns its back on you, you turn your back on the world.” And that is exactly what I am doing now. The Moon Leo in me demands attention like a maniac while the Sun Virgo firmly dictates that he shall not have it; thus conflicts happen and the one stuck in the middle is their miserable host, namely me. Sometimes I feel like a spectre looking at people’s lives and being worried with envy. It’s noxious and I can’t help it. Maybe that explains why I like watching movies and TV series so much – they give me a vicarious sense which allows me to divert my ennui in life.

Someone told me that I had a habit of not making eye contact with others. Since then I’ve been conscious about it and I’ve tried to look at people’s eyes when I’m speaking to them. Since then I’ve been disturbed when someone avoids looking at my face – do I have such an unsightly face? – in a conversation. Or they don’t even bother to look at me at all. Funny. I don’t if they have this bad habit or they just don’t care.

Anyway, I’m not a big fan of monologues so I guess I will stop trying when someone doesn’t seem be very interested in what I want to share with them.

Anyway, find me a way to skip September. I’m looking forward to October, when both American Horror Story SS5 and The Originals SS3 will air.

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