I texted a friend that I was having an ugly wound on my face so that I’d rather stay home and not join them, which is true because the wound, though neither serious nor caused by accident, is unsightly and I bet not many want to look at a face that looks like it has been hit. To tell the truth, I did expect to receive a reply, asking if I was OK or was it serious or something; in the end I received none. A tinge of disappointment, I suppose. It wasn’t that a reply could cause the wound to heal faster, but it would definitely make me a little happier.
Then I remember this is the third time I’ve turned down an invitation to join them. I was being unhappy and a little upset about what had happened; besides, the urge to wallow in my hole by myself was too great. A moody bitch that people will get tired of sooner or later, that is likely me. I wonder if this would be the last time I got an invitation.
I guess all this nuisance of my character could be attributed to my being an introvert. A side note: I scored 100% introvert on a test. Thrice. I once joked with some friends on Facebook that being 100% introvert instantly translates into zero social life, and it’s true in a sense. Instead of going out on a Saturday night and have fun, I recline on the sofa and watch TV, or type something, or find a good story to read. That’s ‘fun’ in my dictionary while going out tires me fast, like burning a candle on both ends. My home is my nest though it’s not paradise. But I do go out, with people I feel comfortable chatting, people I deem ‘close’. Friendship to me is a round cake – the smaller the group, the bigger the share. I want friends, not acquaintances and intimacy is what I seek in friendship – a sense that your friends understand you and you understand them, even when you’re say little words. But it seems they don’t share my idea. The wider the circle, the better. Knowing many is cool, making them feel important rather than the opposite. Communications come easily with them, and those who find it hard to join in have the option to stay out, simple as that.
Well, the world is run by the extroverts, as it was run by the right-handed. Those at the other end of the spectrum are just weirdos.
See my point? No? Me neither. We have that in common. Maybe we should add friends. Just kidding. Anyway, it’s just something to release the frustration from my chest when the ennui climaxes. If you have wasted a few minutes of your life reading this nuisance, sorry about that. Maybe I can make it up for you by some less dull and cynical entries later.