I guess I can describe my view on world in general as similar to my prolonged lack of appetite: things seem appealing for a short while before I lose interest in them to return to the confinement of boredom and indifference.
I have that happens frequently enough – the rollercoaster of moods – to the point I have a slight suspicion that I have bipolar disorder: feeling high as a kite in one minute and a complete lack of interest in anything whatsoever in the next. It’s like a chronic disease we, those mentally unstable individuals trying to tone down our condition by calling it ‘introverts’, have to grit our teeth through it whenever it hits us square in the face. No other way to improve it, I asked and got a very disappointing answer: ‘No.’ I don’t buy that idea, yet up till now it appears the only solution.
And when you see my whining in my diary here you know I’m struck by its annoying hand. Again.
I always have a bizarre fascination with blood, mostly my blood when I bleed it. Thus it should come as no surprise when I hold a fascination with vampires, those beautiful, predatory and gorgeous creatures of the night that are made lame by the Twilight Saga. Sorry, Twilight fans if somehow one or several of you tumble across this offending line, but I mean it when I say Twilight vampires are lame and they would have their sparkling ass handed to them should they encounter other vampires, like the classic Count Dracula or those from The Vampire Chronicles, not to mention the Crusniks in Trinity Blood. Anyway, back to my point. Since I’m a little obsessed with vampires (made my own kinds of vampires in those fanfiction series named ‘Cursed Life’), I sometimes imagine myself as turned a human-turn-vampire. But again, like Lestat and Armand mention as some point, vampires are easily succumbed to the deadly scythe of boredom and loneliness. And it seems to me that with some vampires, the mental problems they had as human will be inherited in them as vampire…….and multiplied ten-fold, like Nicky when he set himself on fire, Louis when he went out to the sun and Lestat when he flung himself to the dessert. If I were made a vampire, I probably would not last even a decade – the glory of the sun, what else.
Well, Lestat was definitely lying to Louis when he said all the latter’s problems would be solved once he became immortal. Damn liar who was at that very time dealing with his own baggage that resulted from his vampirism.
A bonus picture of a vampire couple. If they chose to opt out Lestat’s true love, Louis, I’d rather he pair with Akasha, the pyromaniac Mother of All Vampires, than the boring sort of Bella-like Jesse girl.